Sunday 20 December 2015

5 Reasons Why Every Day Could Be Christmas

Christmas is an amazing time. Soldiers hell bent on killing each other have even set up truces, temporarily halt their mutual slaughter, and play football, as in  WW1. The shops enter heaven on earth as their till takings explode. People talk to those they don’t usually get on with (sometimes including family), and everywhere the spirit of human bonhomie abounds. It’s a cypher for a mini world peace of sorts but here are 5 reasons it could happen 365 days a year.

First give yourself permission

Sure there is the religious celebration of the birth of Christ and its cry for peace on earth in the case of Christmas, and that’s an important stating point. However, the key thing is, some cause, some idea gives us permission to be peaceful and we act on that admonition. Why can’t we give ourselves this admonition and permission every day. It works over Christmas and many religious festivals so it can be done.  The birth of Christ is the “excuse” but we could find any number of “excuses” for giving ourselves permission to be jolly and convivial.

Want for it to work

The second reason we could have Christmas every day is we all want it to work. We all want to have a good time because we are tired of the daily conflicts, game playing, and number one-ism that sadly characterises a lot of interactions with those outside our tight inner circle. The truth is we fight, abuse and control others because we fear that if we don’t we might lose something – our privileges, advantages, special benefits of one sort or another. Of course the cycle of conflict created makes it more likely that further conflict will ensue. Deep down everyone just wants a happy, stress free life we just don’t know how to get it because we haven’t given ourselves permission to have one. (That’s not a life free of challenge by the way, happiness is probably impossible without challenges to motivate us.)

Take responsibility

Thirdly even the most outrageous glums we know grudgingly get into the spirit of Christmas and start to own it for themselves. If at first they give presents because they’re expected to, after a few days of buying them, experience shows that people start to enjoy giving and the tendency becomes one of over giving if anything. So it can be done, and crucially it gets done because each individual takes responsibility for dropping their pebble of largesse into the big ocean and the ripples travel far (and not just to shopkeepers). Actually no one is making you jolly, you are becoming jolly by being jolly and it’s amplified by the jolliness of others.

Guess What? It just doesn't matter

My fourth and favourite reason for saying that Xmas can be an all year thing is that we suddenly subliminally get the notion that whatever is the cause of the conflict ….it doesn’t matter. Not that our conflicts are imagined, we’re not making them up, but we rise above them, behave convivially and soon discover another perspective which enables us to ride over our differences. Why can’t we do that every day?

The downside leads to the upside

The fifth reason Xmas could still be on by say mid-May, early September or whenever is that all the downsides associated with it, debt, alcohol abuse, family and relationship bust ups, even suicide are like the dross that rises to the top when ore is smelted to leave the pure metal running free. We soon learn that it’s the thought not the pound value of the gift that gives the lift, we learn that we don’t need to anaesthetise ourselves with alcohol to become social, we soon realise that falsely love bombing people with prezzies is trumped by an actual relationship based on mutual respect. Under those circumstances, we spend money meaningfully, make the involvement of alcohol the effect of a good relationship not its phoney cause, and that authentic closeness lifts people out of dire lonely misery.

So yes for all these reasons Xmas could run year round in spirit, and everyone would be winners. It is a state of mind kicked off by the religious festival! Do you believe it? Share your view here in the comments.

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